As my organic eating habits have grown more pronounced over the years and my values have become much more clear, my dating life has been impacted in a serious way.
Recently, I was at this organic Mediterranean restaurant here in New York City and saw a woman sitting a few tables away. I thought she absolutely stunning and couldn’t keep my eyes off of her. She had great style, wavy blonde hair and crystal blue eyes. To be honest, I was saying to myself “Is this Kate Hudson that I’m staring at?” I really couldn’t tell and my vision is not bad.
From about 15 feet away, I said to her “you’re very beautiful.” I don’t know what got into me to do this but was somehow compelled to do so.
She seemed very surprised and pointed to her friend, confused about who I was talking to.
“No, you,” I replied and pointed straight back at her. This woman was stunned and couldn’t believe that a strange guy was saying these things to her in front of the entire restaurant.
I then invited her to come sit with me (I was eating alone) and after getting the approval of her two girlfriends, she made her way over.
We continued our short conversation for a few minutes. It was a little awkward and the words were not exactly flowing. I was not nearly as smooth as when we were speaking from across the room. Nevertheless, she appreciated my boldness and happily gave me her cell phone number. We ended up going out a few weeks later.
For our first date, we went to Pure Food and Wine, a raw organic restaurant here in NYC, and sat out in the garden. It was a beautiful night and the weather was cooperating in a major way.
Having first met her at an organic restaurant, I figured that she ate this way as well. However, I was soon told that that was a place she and her friends just happened to pass by that afternoon. The fact that it was organic was a pure coincidence and was not intentional at all.
On the other hand, my going there was purely intentional. It was organic and that is THE criteria in how I select restaurants.
Once we got to talking at dinner, she made a comment that coming to organic restaurants was fine once in a while but she did not want to limit herself to these places. She also liked going to New York City’s hot, trendy restaurants that pop up all of the time. Those words were not exactly music to my ears since they are places that I never frequent.
The few hours we spent together that night were fine yet I didn’t sense any real spark. Desperately wanting to like her since she was beautiful, nice, smart and successful, I took her out one more time but came to the realization that this was not meant to be. I didn’t want to waste any more of her time or mine and told her what I was feeling. I thought she was great but being friends would be the best for the both of us.
The fact that she wasn’t as interested in or committed to organic was not the reason that it didn’t work out between the two of us. There simply wasn’t any chemistry. But it certainly got me thinking.
Am I being far too rigid about my organic food criteria for a woman I will date? Is this severely shrinking the number of possible women with whom I could have a relationship? Believe me, I think about this A LOT.
In a post later on this week, I’ll answer these questions.